Washington D.C., United States – In a stunning reversal, Republican lawmakers have introduced a bill to ban guns, effectively repealing the Second Amendment. “We must do whatever it takes to protect these precious lives—even at 3 a.m. in Baltimore,” declared Rep. Robert White, the bill’s primary proponent. “The fate of thousands rests in our hands.” The move has sparked outrage among right-wing activists. Former Republican supporter Ryan Smith expressed his concerns: “It’s a moral dilemma. On one hand, we’ve spent decades fighting for the rights of the unborn. On the other hand, what if a violent toddler attacks? How are we supposed to defend ourselves?” Despite mounting pressure, Vice President J.D. Vance has reassured conservatives that the gun ban will be “painful yet necessary” and encourages “self-motivated compliance.” However, he declined to clarify how the bill would actually be enforced. Trying to take advantage of the situation, the Democratic Party has proposed an alternative solution: gun owners may keep their firearms—provided they sign a formal acknowledgment swearing never to carry them within 50 feet of a pregnant woman.